Monday, December 12, 2005

Blue Ribbon Baby Diet

Supposedly, this diet will "ward off" high blood pressure and pre-eclampsia. It can't hurt to try it! From blueribbonbaby.org:

Every day of the week, you and your baby must have:
  1. One quart (4 cups) of milk. Any kind will do: whole milk, low fat, skim, powdered, or buttermilk. If you do not like milk, you can substitute one cup of yogurt for each cup of milk.
  2. Two eggs.
  3. One or two servings of fish, shellfish, chicken or turkey, lean beef, veal, lamb, pork, liver or kidney.
    Alternative combinations include:
    • Rice with beans, cheese, sesame, milk
    • Cornmeal with beans, cheese, tofu, milk.
    • Beans with rice, bulgur, cornmeal, wheat noodles sesame seeds, milk.
    • Peanuts with: sunflower seeds, milk.
    • Whole wheat bread or noodles with: beans, cheese, peanut butter, milk, tofu.

    For each serving of meat, you can substitute these quantities of cheese:

    Brick 4 oz.
    Longhorn 3 oz.
    Camembert 6 oz.
    Muenster 4 oz.
    Cheddar 3 oz.
    Monterey Jack 4 oz.
    Cottage 6 oz.
    Swiss 3 oz.
  4. One or two servings of fresh, green, leafy vegetables: mustard, beet, collard, dandelion or turnip greens, spinach, lettuce, cabbage, broccoli, kale, Swiss chard.
  5. Five servings of whole grain breads, rolls, cereals or pancakes: wheatena, 100% bran flakes, granola, shredded wheat, wheat germ, oatmeal, buckwheat or whole wheat pancakes, corn bread, corn tortillas, corn or bran or whole wheat muffins, waffles, brown rice.
  6. Two choices from: a whole potato (any style), large green pepper, grapefruit, lemon, lime, papaya, tomato (one piece of fruit, or one large glass of juice).
  7. Three pats of butter.
Also include in your diet, in addition to the above (i.e., don't count one food in two categories):
  1. A yellow- or orange-colored vegetable or fruit five times a week.
  2. Liver once a week, if you like it.
  3. Table salt: SALT YOUR FOOD TO TASTE
  4. Water: Drink to thirst.

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The Angel on top of the Christmas Tree

A hilarious Christmas forward from my SIL.  Enjoy!


One particular Christmas season a long time ago,
Santa was getting ready for his annual trip...
but there were problems everywhere.

Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves
did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones
so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit.
This stressed Santa even more. When he
went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them
were about to give birth and two had jumped the
fence and were out, heaven knows where.

More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh
one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to
the ground and scattered the toys.

So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup
of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he went to the
cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hid the
liquor and there was nothing to drink. In his
frustration, he accidentally dropped the coffee pot
and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over
the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and
found that mice had eaten the straw it was made
from.

Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his
way to the door. He opened the door and there was a
little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas Santa. Isn't it just a lovely day?
I have a beautiful tree for you. Isn't it just a lovely tree?
Where would you like me to stick it?"

And thus began the tradition of sticking the
little angel on top of the Christmas tree.